Less Wires and More Freedom

Thursday, February 22
2 lbs, 8.8 oz

Debbie, Vic's sister, is kind enough to drive me around today and Ella's preschool was very gracious and offered to take her additional days during the week until Carson comes home. We are very fortunate to have such great friends and family. So after dropping off Ella at school and having my staples removed, we visit Carson. Carson does look tiny when he's wrapped up in his blanket, but he looks extremely tiny when he's unwrapped. They continue to increase his feedings: beginning at noon - 16 cc and at 6PM - 19 cc and he continues to put on weight.

Friday, February 23
2 lbs, 8.9 oz

Carson gains more freedom; they removed the monitor that was attached to his foot and took out his IV. Less wires and more freedom... This makes me a bit more comfortable with him. I check out his toes today; while his fingers are long and skinny, his toes are so so very small. He is staying awake more throughout the day. They are also switching from donor breast milk to formula (20 calorie) and increasing the quantity to 22 cc at the 6AM feeding. Danielle, his evening nurse, informs us that he has been experiencing some heart rate drops. It sounds scary so I have some trouble sleeping. After learning a little bit more though, it appears as if this is common in premature babies and that adults probably experience this, too. NICU becomes concerned if the heart rate does not come back to normal range and the baby requires stimulation to come back to normal. Doesn't he look like a doll in my arms?

Saturday, February 24
2 lbs. 10.3 oz.

While Vic & I are visiting Carson this evening, we experience 2 of these heart rate drops. It is displayed as an alarm on his monitoring screen; however, his heart rate bounced back to normal. I'm still not completely comfortable with this "alarm" and plan to read about this. One of the drops occurred while the nurse was changing his diaper and she referred to it as "bearing down." At the 6PM feeding, they increase his quantity to 23 cc and fortify his formula to 22 calories. The extra calories are intended to increase his weight.

Sunday, February 25
2 lbs, 11.3 oz.

still 15" in length

When Vic & I arrive at NICU, Carson is sleeping. He wakes up shortly thereafter and stays awake during the entire visit. He definitely is more alert. He's moving more and more everyday and seems to stretch more. Up to this point, Carson was more curled up. He seriously must know I'm mom because he spits up again while I am holding him. OK, he does spit up on Danielle, the evening nurse, so he's not completely discriminating. The nurses aren't concerned about his spit-ups though because he's not crying or having gas and his stomach is still soft. He also gets the hiccups for quite a while. I achieve two things today:

1. I place him back in his incubator on my own.
2. I undress and dress him in a sleeper.

When I was dressing him, it was obvious how tiny he is. Imagine pulling his skinny wrists and legs through the clothing - so fragile. He was very patient with me and didn't cry or fuss. Vic & I also decorated his area with some pictures of friends and family. We are also planning to take Ella shopping so that she can buy a toy for her little brother. We're not sure how that will go since she is going through a "mine" phase.

Carson or Gavin?

Sunday, February 18

2lbs, 7.3 oz.

After hearing some rumblings in Brother's belly, the nurse determines it's time to insert a feeding tube through his nose to his stomach. He will receive donor breast milk for approx. one week and then transition to formula. Brother officially weighs more than his original birth weight. He also received phototherapy today because his bilirubin level was slightly high; this condition is also known as jaundice. Brother wears sunglasses during his treatment. At 6PM and every 3 hours thereafter, Brother is fed 3 cc of breast milk. 30 cc = 1 oz. When Ella came home from the hospital at 4 lbs, 11 oz, she was taking 30 cc every 3 hours.

Vic's parents, his brother Kirk, and my friend Jenny came to visit today.

Monday, February 19

2 lbs, 7 oz.

Brother's bilirubin levels are normal and so phototherapy is stopped. His levels will be monitored and treatment can be restarted if necessary. Brother's feedings are doubled to 6 cc every 3 hours beginning at noon today. Ella goes to preschool today and Vic comes to visit. We have a marathon name meeting and come down to Carson or Gavin. We like both names. When Vic asks Ella for her opinion, she chooses Carson. We consider:

• Carson James G.. or Gavin James G..
• Carson G.. or Gavin G..
• Mr. Carson G.. or Mr. Gavin G..
• Carson G.. with the winning touchdown and Gavin G.. with the winning touchdown
• Vic, Tonya, Ella & Carson or Vic, Tonya, Ella & Gavin
• Ella & Carson or Ella & Gavin
• and of course, when you're upset... Carson James or Gavin James

It's official - Carson James.

My friend, Lynn, and her daughter, Jordan, visit us today.

Tuesday, February 20

2 lbs, 7.2 oz

Carson was ready to eat and so they continue to increase his feedings. He will receive 8 cc every three hours beginning at 6PM. He has one spit-up in the early afternoon, of course while I'm holding him. That must mean he knows I am his mom.

I am discharged from the hospital and anxious to get home. Ella greets me and is ready to play. I am relieved to take a shower in my own shower and sleep in my own bed. I sleep like a little baby. The swelling is still persistent in my lower legs, ankles & feet. Even my stomach remains swollen. I am very impatient about these extra fluids and hope they'll go away soon. Vic's sister, Debbie, makes chicken and dumplings for us - they were delicious.

Since Ella is all of 20 months, I tried to explain that she would soon have a baby brother. I needed to keep the explanations as simple as possible. She came to understand that Brother was in momma's belly and that all blue clothes belonged to Brother. She pronounced Brother as "Bruh-fer" - too cute! About a month ago though, she spotted a box on the side of the road. I asked her what she thought was in the box; she replied "Bruh-fer". The response was completely unexpected and I am certain that I giggled. Thereafter, if you asked Ella where Brother was, she replied "box". It was a game to her and she loves to make you laugh.

So, when I came home from the hospital, I asked Ella where Brother was. She responded with the correct answer - "momma's belly". Keeping it simple, I then explained that momma's belly went pop and that Brother was at the doctor's office. I also told her that Brother's name was Carson. This is all mind-boggling data for a 20 month old. She does know that Brother is at the doctor's; however, she thinks Brother's name is "Bruh-fer". Lindsi, the nurse, said that Ella will be able to meet Carson through a window in a few more weeks. Ella has seen pictures of him and wants her toys back that she sees in those pictures. She's going through the MINE phase right now.

Wednesday, February 21

2 lbs, 8.2 oz.

Carson is doing well with his feedings so they continue to increase the amounts - 11 cc at noon and then 14 cc at 6PM. In the picture below, you can compare my size 5 ring to Carson's size. No need to say anything more...

How Tiny!

Saturday, February 17

2 lbs, 6 oz.

To reduce the risk of seizures, I receive mag again for 24 hours after delivery. This time, however, they give me some strong anti-nausea meds. Things are better, but I am a ball of mud from Friday evening thru Saturday afternoon. The doctor does take me off the mag around noon on Saturday - 6 hours early and I am grateful.

Vic, Cherie, Debbie and Ella visit at Good Sam. Ella thinks that my wheelchair is a stroller and she likes my bed. She's been on a McDonald's diet for 3 days, but at least she chooses apple dippers over fries. Unfortunately, Big Sister Ella isn't allowed to visit "Brother" in NICU. Check out her Cheetos smile!

Brother is doing well - continues to breathe on his own and no meds. He is wearing a blue Gerber onesie and a hand-knit blue hat; the preemie size is still too big on him. He has eyebrows and lots of hair on his head. I should've known - Brother gets the hair and Ella has to wait a year for hair. He sleeps approximately 22 hours of the 24 hours in a day, but does open his eyes. I think he looks like a little old man especially when he wrinkles his forehead. He stays in an isolette (or incubator) which helps him maintain his body temperature. He'll progress to a big boy bed (aka crib) when he gains more weight and can maintain his own temperature. Since no sounds are coming from his bowels, he remains on sugar water through an IV. The NICU nurses work 12 hour shifts and the evening nurses weigh him every night. They measure head circumference and length on Sundays.

Volunteers make quilts and hats for the babies in NICU. Brother's quilt is colorful with lots of dogs on it. Lindsi is one of the nurses taking good care of Brother. She is fantastic! She requested that Brother is her primary baby; this means that she'll take care of him when she works. Each nurse has three babies in her care per day. Lindsi went to UC and has worked in the NICU for about 5 years.

We are very grateful for Carson's health, his doctors and nurses and our family and friends.

Ready or Not... Here I Come

February 14 (Surprise! Surprise!)
I braved the snow & ice to make my weekly doctor appt & ultrasound. Then WHAM! Dr White informs me that I will be having the baby within the next 24 hours due to growing concerns about growth restrictions and preeclampsia. They consider preeclampsia when 3 conditions are met: high blood pressure, protein in urine and severe swelling. I had all 3 symptoms. I was wheeled over to Christ Hospital and they immediately started mag (magnesium sulfate) through an IV. Good thing I didn't know what mag was - I'll spare everyone the details. They also gave me a shot to help the baby's lungs. I was then transported to Good Samaritan Hospital by ambulance and admitted to their Special OB Unit. After arriving there, the urgency decreased. Good Sam sees more high risk pregnancies than Christ Hospital.

February 15 (Time to Relax)
After an ultrasound & BPP at Good Samaritan, the doctor determines that they won't be delivering the baby at this time. Ideally, they'd like to deliver him around 34 weeks which means 2 weeks of bed rest in the hospital. The good news - they'll stop the mag and I can at least watch TV, read or surf the web. I'll be closely monitored - fetal heart beat 3 times per day and daily ultrasounds. If the baby's health changes, they may deliver him earlier than 34 weeks. They administer the second shot for the baby's lungs, too.

February 16 (How Quickly Things Change)
After the mag is stopped, I'm a whole new person. I am a functioning human being who can push myself up in bed and turn over. I can even shower and use the bathroom on my own. They decide to do ultrasounds twice a week instead of daily. Things are looking good or so I thought... After listening to his heart beat in the early afternoon, the doctor doesn't like the last 10 minutes of the report so I am scheduled for a BPP (Biophysical Profile) at 2:30P. The baby is scored on a scale of 0 to 8 during the BPP. He's consistently scored an 8/8, but not today... He scores a 4 out of 8. After returning to my room around 3:30P, the doctor has a party waiting for me. They will be doing a c-section immediately.

So, Carson James arrived 8 weeks early at 6:33P on Friday, Feb 16. He weighed 2 lbs and 6.8 oz. He was 15 inches in length. He was tiny, but feisty. He has continued to breathe on his own and requires no medications. We are grateful for him and his health. He has wonderful nurses in the NICU at Good Samaritan and they expect him to stay there for the next 4 weeks or longer if necessary.